Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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