I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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