don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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