my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
