We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
