Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
