I'm gonna have a badass scar
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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