Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
