tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I am available for nakedness
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
