i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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