wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
