no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Randomize
