You're so nebulous sometimes
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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