You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
