he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize