your room smells of hookers.
And success
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
