Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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