just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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