Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
