i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
