im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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