All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
