Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Small penises have feelings too.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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