its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
