I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
