Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
