"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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