I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Randomize
