dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
