I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
