we're blogging at a bar
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
