yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
