May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
