she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Im part way to drunk.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
