you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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