If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
