We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
