Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
