it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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