I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
