.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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