I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
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