Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
