Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
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