Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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