I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
false alarm. still invincible.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
