dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
