32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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