It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
