Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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